Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Sexual Harassment... Panda

I have had obscene remarks whispered at me twice on the Tube this week. I can't say why this is - perhaps I am looking particulary receptive to the sexual advances of madmen at the moment, or perhaps London's perverts are just feeling especially ebullient.

Yesterday, the man standing behind me on the escalator at Westminster felt compelled to tell me I had a "nice ass" and started breathing heavily. And on Monday I was walking out onto the Victoria line platform at King's Cross, when a small crumpled-looking man urgently mumbled something that included the word "pussy". When I realised what he'd said, I wrinkled my nose in distaste. That's rubbish sexual harassment, I thought: Speak up, man! I looked back. He looked at me. He was so small I probably could have had him a fight, so I was really tempted to shout back, "I'm sorry... what? WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT MY PUSSY?"

Instead, because I'm a coward, I just went home and thought about that awesome episode of Sex and The City where Miranda marches up to the builder who's been wolf-whistling at her as she returns her videos. "Come on, big boy, take me now! I want to get laid!" she shouts in his face. "Hey lady," he replies, painfully embarrassed. "Easy, I'm married."

God, I'd love to do that, it would be so satisfying. When I'm found stabbed on the underground, you'll know that I have.


Blogger Bowleserised said...

Hollaback is your friend. There's a London one, but it's not as busy as the New York site.

8/02/2006 2:58 pm  
Blogger galatea said...

What is this Hollaback of which you speak? The name makes it sound like the kind of club I'm not cool enough to go to.

8/02/2006 3:34 pm  
Blogger Kieran said...

I hate that bit in Sex and the City. Would that honestly work with a British builder? I'm skeptical.

You probably should've beaten up the little guy - it sends out a message to the rest of the freaks. If you see him again, you know what to do.

8/02/2006 4:00 pm  
Blogger Brit in Hokkaido said...

I once had an altercation with a builder the day my Grandpa died.

Obviously I was walking along with a face like a slapped ass, and he told me so adding "cheer up love, it might never happen, you'd be quite pretty if you smiled a bit", I went NUTS and completely lost it in the middle of the High Street.

He just kind of stood there without saying much...and then went back to his pneumatic drilling.

I felt a bit better though.

8/02/2006 4:06 pm  
Blogger Bowleserised said...

I thinnk. Links off there to other Hollas.

8/02/2006 6:19 pm  
Blogger LĂ©onie said...

Once, when in a particularly bad mood, I encountered wolf-whistling and bap-based comments from some chavs on the other side of the street. I stopped, turned around, and picked my nose elaborately in their general direction.

They lost interest pretty quickly after that. Victory tasted sweet, albeit a bit snotty.

8/03/2006 1:22 pm  

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